What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty
Fiction
2011 Amy Einhorn Books (G.P. Putnam’s Sons)
Finished on 9/26/13
Rating: 4.5/5 (Terrific!)
Publisher’s Blurb:
Alice Love is twenty-nine years old, deeply in love with her husband, and pregnant with their first child. Or so she thinks. Everything she knows to be true vanishes the day she wakes up on the floor of a gym (a gym? She HATES the gym!) to learn she is actually thirty-nine, has three children, and is in the midst of an acrimonious divorce.
With a decade of memories gone, Alice has to place together who she has become. But she isn’t sure if she likes what she sees, and she discovers that in the end, forgetting might be the most memorable thing that’s ever happened to her.
I don’t know why I waited so long (three years!) to read this book. Perhaps after reading several novels, back-to-back, dealing with memory loss (Still Alice, Before I Go to Sleep, and Turn of Mind), I wanted to wait and let this one stand alone in my memory. Or maybe after hearing a co-worker rave about it, I wanted to wait for the hype to settle down. Whatever the reason, it was certainly worth the wait. I began the book on our flight to New Mexico (yes, back in September!) and was completely engrossed, barely nodding my head at the flight attendant when asked if I wanted something to drink. Our days were long and full as we explored Santa Fe, Taos and the surrounding mountain areas, so I didn’t find much time for reading, but I did get quite a bit more read on our flights back to Lincoln, finishing up a few days after we’d returned home. I loved the originality of the story and was disappointed when the final pages drew near. This is one I’m going to hang on to, with hopes of a re-read in the coming years. It might also be entertaining on audio, as the dialogue is quite humorous.
Final Thoughts:
Set in 2008, poor Alice has no recollection of the past decade. Baffled by the mention of Y2K, texting, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (what happened to Gwyneth??), she is, more importantly, confused about her personal history. Who are those three children and why do they keep calling her Mummy? Part love story, part mystery, and yet not your typical breezy beach read, What Alice Forgot is an addictive, humorous and thought-provoking story and one that you’ll want to pass around to all your friends. I’m eager to curl up with some more books by Moriarty. Any recommendations? I keep hearing that The Husband’s Secret is another smart, funny novel.
P.S. Jojo Moyes and Liane Moriarty may be my new favorite authors of 2013.
Turn of Mind
by Alice LaPlante
Fiction
2011 Atlantic Monthly Press
Finished 7/11/11
Rating: 4.75/5 (Terrific!)
"A uniquely entertaining murder mystery. LaPlante's portrayal of the prime suspect's escalating dementia is gripping, unnerving, and utterly brilliant."—Lisa Genova
Publisher’s Blurb:
A large sign is taped to the kitchen wall.
My name is Dr. Jennifer White
I am 64 years old. I have dementia.
My son, Mark, is 29. My daughter, Fiona, 24.
A caregiver, Magdalena, lives with me.
Already sold in eleven countries, Turn of Mind is a stunning first novel, both literary and thriller about a retired orthopedic surgeon with dementia. As the book opens, Dr. Jennifer White’s best friend, Amanda, who lived down the block, has been killed, and four fingers have been surgically removed. Dr. White is the prime suspect. And she herself doesn’t know whether she did it.
Told in her own voice, fractured and eloquent, a picture emerges of a complex family and the surprisingly intimate alliance between life-long friends—two proud, forceful women who were at times each other’s most formidable adversaries.
I loved this book! Almost as much as I loved Still Alice (Lisa Genova). I started reading it a few days before we flew out to Oregon for our family reunion, but set it aside because I was devouring it too quickly. I wanted to have something compelling to read on our long flights! And, oh, it turned out to be the perfect in-flight read. The short, succinct paragraphs (fragmented, really, to reflect the main character's state of mind) allowed for interruptions without losing the tempo of this fast-paced page-turner. I love a good mystery and enjoyed the suspense of this particular story, but as with Still Alice, it was the enlightening and thought-provoking glimpses into the life of a woman suffering from dementia that spoke to me.
I can still read, I’m not that far gone, not yet. No books anymore, but newspaper articles. Magazine pieces, if they’re short enough. I have a system. I take a sheet of lined paper. I write down notes, just like in medical school.
When I get confused, I read my notes. I refer back to them. I can take two hours getting through a single Tribune article, half a day to get through The New York Times. Now, as I sit at the table, I pick up a paper someone discarded, a pencil. I write in the margins as I read. These are Band-Aid solutions. The violent flare-ups continue. They have reaped what they sowed and should repent.
Afterward, I look at these notes but am left with nothing but a sense of unease, of uncontrol.
and
From my notebook:
A good day. Excellent day, my brain mostly clear. I performed a Mini-Cog test on myself. Uncertain of the year, month, and day, but confident of the season. Not sure of my age, but I recognized the woman I saw in the mirror. Still a touch of auburn in the hair, deep brown eyes unfaded, the lines around the eyes and forehead, if not exactly laugh lines, at least indicating a sense of humor.
I know my name: Jennifer White. I know my address: 2153 Sheffield. And spring has arrived.
Why am I so drawn to these stories? Am I preparing for the possibility of losing my memory? Am I simply being practical or is this more voyeuristic -- and perhaps more ominous -- in nature?
Just how would it feel to not know your own children? For you or for them?
We have a visitor, Jen. Aren’t you glad we had a bath? Look how nice your hair looks!
It is a face I have seen before. That’s what I am reduced to now. No more names. Just characteristics, if they are idiosyncratic enough, and knowing whether a face is familiar or unfamiliar.
And those are not absolute categories. I can be looking at a face that I have decided is unfamiliar only to have its features shift and reveal a visage that is not only known but beloved.
I didn’t recognize my own mother this morning, disguised as she was. But then she revealed herself. She cried as she held my hand. I comforted her as best I could. I explained that, yes, it had been a difficult birth, but I would be home soon, the baby was doing well. But where is James? [Jennifer’s deceased husband] I asked. Mom, Dad can’t be here right now. Why are you calling me Mom and him Dad? More tears.
And then my mother was gone.
Now this one. A different sort altogether.
And for the spouses and partners:
My life partner had Alzheimer’s. Early onset. She was a lot younger than you—only forty-five…
People think it’s just forgetting your keys, she says. Or the words for things. But there are the personality changes. The mood swings. The hostility and even violence. Even from the gentlest person in the world. You lose the person you love. And you are left with the shell…
And you are expected to go on loving them even when they are no longer there. You are supposed to be loyal. It’s not that other people expect it. It’s that you expect it of yourself. And you long for it to be over soon.
It broke my heart…
Turn of Mind is an exceptionally poignant and complex debut novel, and it still haunts me, as does Still Alice.
My friend and fellow blogger, Joy, had this to say:
Hooray! Another book gets added onto my Best Reads of 2011 list! Having a murder mystery intertwined with a dementia patient made for a very intriguing read. The progression of Jennifer's illness was depicted very well, and I could sympathize with her struggles. It was incredibly interesting to hear her thoughts as she went in and out of the here and now. I didn't become as attached to Jennifer, like I did with Alice in Still Alice (Genova), but I was certainly turning the pages just as fast. (Thoughts of Joy)
Go here to read her full review.
Go here to listen to an interview with Alice LaPlante on the Diane Rehm Show on NPR.
This is the New Zealand cover art. I think I prefer it over the U.S. version, don't you?
Before I Go to Sleep: A Novel
by S. J. Watson
Thriller
2011 Harper
Finished on 7/3/11
Rating: 4.5/5 Terrific!
Publisher’s Blurb:
"As I sleep, my mind will erase everything I did today. I will wake up tomorrow as I did this morning. Thinking I’m still a child. Thinking I have a whole lifetime of choice ahead of me. . . ."
Memories define us.
So what if you lost yours every time you went to sleep?
Your name, your identity, your past, even the people you love—all forgotten overnight.
And the one person you trust may be telling you only half the story.
Welcome to Christine's life.
Oh, my gosh. This was such a good book! Some reviewers have mentioned that it was a bit repetitious, but I wasn’t bothered by that in the least. I couldn’t stop thinking about Christine and her predicament, wondering who (or what) in the world was responsible for her amnesia. My heart raced as I read, far too late into the night, the tension building and feeling a sense of dread as the final chapters drew near. I wanted to shout, “Don’t go!” but of course, she couldn’t hear me. And even if she did, she wouldn’t remember my words of caution when she awoke the next morning. Can you imagine?! Our memories make up such a large part of who we are and to lose everything you know every single night—and to know that you would do so—would be unbearable to me. What purpose would one have to continue living? And how exhausting for those around you, having to relive and explain all the important information that would help you to understand who you are. To awaken every morning and not know where you are, who is sleeping in your bed, or even how old you are. Mind-boggling!
I raced through this book in less than a week. These days, that’s pretty fast for me! Watson kept me guessing, but I felt the conclusion was a bit rushed. Nonetheless, I thought it was a fabulous read and will be on the look out for more by this talented author.
Thanks to Kay and Bellezza, I discovered this thrilling novel:
We were meant to feel the bewilderment and fright that the protagonist felt as she reeled from one day to the next learning the same things over and over. And, as I said above, the sense of menace increases as she peels back the layers to finally arrive at that specific memory that lurks in her subconscious. In fact, I finally found myself sitting on the edge of my chair as I read, actually quite physically uncomfortable, as I raced through the pages to that shocking ending. I found this a most compelling and disturbing book, especially the parts about the memory. (Kay, from My Random Acts of Reading)
Go here to read Kay’s full review.
Imagine the distress in waking and not knowing if you were grown up or still a child. Married. Or, even a mother. She must totally rely on the things her husband, and her doctor, are telling her. And someone is lying. Because the stories and her feelings don't match up; as her memories come back to her bit by bit, she comes closer and closer to discovering the truth.
A nail biting truth with a harrowing edge. One that makes me grateful for my choices, and my memory, upon turning the final page. (Bellezza, from Dolce Bellezza)
Go here to read Bellezza’s entire review.
“Memento on crystal meth.” Dennis Lehane
Oh, yeah.
Still Alice
by Lisa Genova
Fiction
2009 Pocket Books
Finished on 3/16/09
Rating: 5/5 (Outstanding!)
Product Description:
An extraordinary debut novel about an accomplished woman who slowly loses her thoughts and memories to a harrowing disease—only to discover that each day brings a new way of living and loving.
Alice Howland is proud of the life she worked so hard to build. At fifty years old, she's a cognitive psychology professor at Harvard and a world-renowned expert in linguistics with a successful husband and three grown children. When she becomes increasingly disoriented and forgetful, a tragic diagnosis changes her life—and her relationship with her family and the world—forever.
At once beautiful and terrifying, Still Alice is a moving and vivid depiction of life with early-onset Alzheimer's disease that is as compelling as A Beautiful Mind and as unforgettable as Ordinary People.
I come from a long line of incredibly good genes. My maternal grandmother was 88 years old when she died, and up until her last few months, she was one of the most active and vivacious people I've ever known. She walked every day, entertained friends and family, was an avid gardener, a voracious reader, and even went white-water rafting with my godmother (they were both in their eighties!). Her mother was just as spry, living a long and healthy life of 96 years. My mother (who turns 76 in May) is following in their footsteps. She has inherited their joie de vivre, cooking and entertaining visitors and neighbors, volunteering at her local library (she's also a voracious reader), and traveling hither and yon with my stepfather. I hope to be at least half as active when I'm in my 70's!
The paternal side of my family could have been cut from the same cloth. My grandfather led a busy and active life (also one to walk every day) until succumbing to prostate cancer at the age of 92. My father turned 76 in January, and up until a year ago February, he and my stepmother had lived aboard their 1957 Richardson motor yacht for 15 years! As some of you may know, living aboard a boat is both physically and mentally demanding, but my father is more than up to the task.
My husband likes to joke about marrying a woman of "good stock." And yet, he's right. Lucky or blessed, I'm very fortunate to have been born into a family of such good genes and longevity. None of my grandparents or parents have any history of Alzheimer's. So I shouldn't worry, right? After reading Lisa Genova's incredibly powerful novel, I can't help it. I'm terrified! Still Alice puts a frightening face on this fatal disease. As Alice claims:
She wished she had cancer instead. She'd trade Alzheimer's for cancer in a heartbeat. She felt ashamed for wishing this and it was certainly a pointless bargaining, but she permitted the fantasy anyway. With cancer, she'd have something that she could fight. There was surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy. There was the chance that she could win. Her family and the community at Harvard would rally behind her battle and consider it noble. And even if defeated in the end, she'd be able to look them knowingly in the eye and say good-bye before she left.
Alzheimer's disease was an entirely different kind of beast. There were no weapons that could slay it. Taking Aricept and Namenda felt like aiming a couple of leaky squirt guns in to the face of a blazing fire. John continued to probe into the drugs in clinical development, but she doubted that any of them were ready and capable of making a significant difference for her, else he would already have been on the phone with Dr. Davis, insisting on a way to get her on them. Right now, everyone with Alzheimer's faced the same outcome, whether they were eighty-two or fifty, resident of the Mount Auburn Manor or a full professor of psychology at Harvard University. The blazing fire consumed all. No one got out alive.
And while a bald head and a looped ribbon were seen as badges of courage and hope, her reluctant vocabulary and vanishing memories advertised mental instability and impending insanity. Those with cancer could expect to be supported by their community. Alice expected to be outcast. Even the well-intentioned and educated tended to keep a fearful distance from the mentally ill. She didn't want to become someone people avoided and feared.
Alice is a professor of psychology at Harvard University. Her expertise lies in psycholinguistics. She is one of the ten percent of those afflicted with Alzheimer's who are under the age of sixty-five. Alice is fifty years old and she has early-onset Alzheimer's.
On the annoying frustration of early symptoms:
"Come on," she urged, wishing she could attach a couple of jumper cables to her head and give herself a good, strong zap.
She didn't have time for Alzheimer's today. She had emails to return, a grant proposal to write, a class to teach, and a seminar to attend. And at the end of the day, a run. Maybe a run would give her some clarity.
and
Cued by the hanging rise in her inflection and the silence that followed, Alice knew it was her turn to speak but was still catching up to all that Lydia had just said. Without the aid of the visual cues of the person she talked to, conversations on the phone often baffled her. Words sometimes ran together, abrupt changes in topic were difficult for her to anticipate and follow, and her comprehension suffered. Although writing presented its own set of problems, she could keep them hidden from discovery because she wasn't restricted to real-time responding.
On the future:
Although Alzheimer's tended to progress more quickly in the early-onset versus late-onset form, people with early-onset usually lived with the disease for many years longer, this disease of the mind residing in relatively young and healthy bodies. She could stick around all the way to the brutal end. She'd be unable to feed herself, unable to talk, unable to recognize John and her children. She'd be curled up in the fetal position, and because she'd forget how to swallow, she'd develop pneumonia. And John, Anna, Tom, and Lydia would agree not to treat it with a simple course of antibiotics, riddled with guilt over feeling grateful that something had finally come along that would kill her body.
We all forget names. We find ourselves at a loss for a particular word. We recognize an acquaintance and yet can't for the life of us remember his name (or, for that matter, how we know him). And yet, we don't get lost in our own neighborhood. Or walk into a neighbor's kitchen, mistaking it for our own as we search the cupboards for coffee filters. Or forgot how to put on our underwear. Lisa Genova has written an incredible book that paints a vivid portrait of this progressively fatal disease. Still Alice is not an easy read, and yet I couldn't put it down. I read it in less than two days and I can't stop thinking about it. I've gone on to peruse the Alzheimer's Association's website and discovered the following information:
Today we know that Alzheimer’s:
Is a progressive and fatal brain disease. As many as 5 million Americans are living with Alzheimer’s disease. Alzheimer's destroys brain cells, causing problems with memory, thinking and behavior severe enough to affect work, lifelong hobbies or social life. Alzheimer’s gets worse over time, and it is fatal. Today it is the sixth-leading cause of death in the United States.Is the most common form of dementia, a general term for the loss of memory and other intellectual abilities serious enough to interfere with daily life. Vascular dementia, another common type of dementia, is caused by reduced blood flow to parts of the brain. In mixed dementia, Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia occur together.Has no current cure. But treatments for symptoms, combined with the right services and support, can make life better for the millions of Americans living with Alzheimer’s. We’ve learned most of what we know about Alzheimer’s in the last 15 years. There is an accelerating worldwide effort under way to find better ways to treat the disease, delay its onset, or prevent it from developing.Early-stage is the early part of Alzheimer’s disease when problems with memory, thinking and concentration may begin to appear in a doctor’s interview or medical tests. Individuals in the early-stage typically need minimal assistance with simple daily routines. At the time of a diagnosis, an individual is not necessarily in the early stage of the disease; he or she may have progressed beyond the early stage.
The term younger-onset refers to Alzheimer's that occurs in a person under age 65. Younger-onset individuals may be employed or have children still living at home. Issues facing families include ensuring financial security, obtaining benefits and helping children cope with the disease. People who have younger-onset dementia may be in any stage of dementia – early, middle or late. Experts estimate that some 500,000 people in their 30s, 40s and 50s have Alzheimer's disease or a related dementia. • 10 million baby boomers will develop Alzheimer's in their lifetime.
• Every 71 seconds, someone develops Alzheimer’s.
At this time, there is no treatment to cure, delay or stop the progression of Alzheimer's disease. FDA-approved drugs temporarily slow worsening of symptoms for about 6 to 12 months, on average, for about half of the individuals who take them.
I can do everything right: eat nutritionally healthy meals, drink in moderation, exercise on a regular basis, stimulate my brain by reading and writing, stay socially active, and abstain from smoking -- and yet, I may still wake up one morning and brush my teeth with shaving cream. Or fill Annie's water bowl with orange juice. All in spite of those good genes I inherited.
I'm sure there are some who can't bring themselves to read this poignant story. It's heartbreakingly sad; oh, so real. And yet, I think it helps to serve those of us who may someday have to face the reality of a loved-one looking at us and asking our name. Or asking if we're married or have any children. And to smile back at that curious face and reply, "Yes, sweetie. I'm Lesley. I'm your wife and we have two daughters." I would want to understand the reason for that absent look in his eyes or why he doesn't know who I am or why he can no longer read his books. I don't want to get angry and frustrated. I would hope to be patient and loving. As I would hope he would be with me, if it were me not recognizing him.
Still Alice is more than just a story about a wife and mother. It's an important lesson in compassion and in understanding a fatally progressive disease. I can't recommend it highly enough. This is for anyone who has a grandparent, parent, sibling, spouse or child.
Thank you, Lisa, for your amazing debut novel. You have given the Alzheimer's community a gift of love and awareness.
Go here and here to listen to Lisa speak about her book.
Tune in to HBO's Alzheimer's Project, beginning on May 10th. This four-part documentary is helping to change the way America views Alzheimer's.
Click here for Lisa's website.
