Showing posts with label Essays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Essays. Show all posts

August 20, 2025

Keep Moving



Keep Moving: Notes on Loss, Creativity, and Change by Maggie Smith
Nonfiction
2020
Finished on August 16, 2025
Rating: 4/5 (Very Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

For fans of Anne Lamott and Cleo Wade, a collection of quotes and essays on facing life’s challenges with creativity, courage, and resilience.

When Maggie Smith, the award-winning author of the viral poem “Good Bones,” started writing daily Twitter posts in the wake of her divorce, they unexpectedly caught fire. In this deeply moving book of quotes and essays, Maggie writes about new beginnings as opportunities for transformation. Like kintsugi, the Japanese art of mending broken ceramics with gold, Keep Moving celebrates the beauty and strength on the other side of loss. This is a book for anyone who has gone through a difficult time and is wondering: What comes next?

Last winter I was introduced to Maggie Smith's writing when I encountered her outstanding memoir, You Could Make This Place Beautiful. I was so captivated with her writing that I immediately ordered a copy of Keep Moving, Smith's earlier book of essays and quotations. Rather than read it cover-to-cover in a few days, I decided to devote several months to the book, reading two or three pages at a time. It's a wonderful book for anyone dealing with loss, whether that be due to divorce or the death of a loved one.

April 24, 2025

I've Tried Being Nice

 


I've Tried Being Nice by Ann Leary
Nonfiction - Essays
Narrated by Ann Leary
2024
Finished on April 22, 2025
Rating: 3.5/5

Publisher's Blurb:

New York Times bestselling author Ann Leary offers a literary feast of humor and wisdom told from the perspective of a recovering people pleaser.

Having arrived at a certain age (her prime), Ann Leary casts a wry backward glance at a life spent trying—and often failing—to be nice. With wit and surprising candor, Leary recounts the bedlam of home bat invasions, an obsession with online personality tests, and the mortification of taking ballroom dance lessons with her actor husband. She describes hilarious red-carpet fiascos and other observations from the sidelines of fame, while also touching upon her more poignant struggles with alcoholism, her love for her family, her dogs, and so much more.

Prepare to laugh, cry, cringe and revel in the comically relatable chaos of Ann Leary’s life as revealed in this delightful collection of essays.

It's been a dozen years since I listened to Ann Leary's humorous novel, The Good House. She's not an author who's on my radar, but after reading a couple of glowing reviews for I've Tried Being Nice, I decided to check it out. Leary's essays are relatable, and I enjoyed her anecdotes about numerous moves during childhood, virtual/online friendships, her frustration with neighbors' dogs running through her property, and her family's love of their own dogs (they has rescued or purchased dozens of dogs), to name just a few. 

I've Tried Being Nice is the sort of book to be read in fits & spurts. Leary's a witty writer, but her audio narration of this collection of essays did not work for me. Her halting delivery (is this her normal speaking pattern or was she pausing for emphasis?) after every third or fourth word became an annoyance the longer I listened. I love memoirs and essays, but I wish I had gone with the print edition. Too bad she didn't get Mary Beth Hurt (narrator of her novel, The Good House) to read for her.

Recommend in print.

December 5, 2024

I Feel Bad About My Neck

 

I Feel Bad About My Neck by Nora Ephron
Nonfiction - Essays
2006
Finished on December 1, 2024
Rating: 4/5 (Very Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

With her disarming, intimate, completely accessible voice, and dry sense of humor, Nora Ephron shares with us her ups and downs in I Feel Bad About My Neck, a candid, hilarious look at women who are getting older and dealing with the tribulations of maintenance, menopause, empty nests, and life itself.

The woman who brought us When Harry Met Sally..., Sleepless in Seattle, You've Got Mail, and Bewitched, and the author of best sellers Heartburn, Scribble Scribble, and Crazy Salad, discusses everything--from how much she hates her purse to how much time she spends attempting to stop the clock: the hair dye, the treadmill, the lotions and creams that promise to slow the aging process but never do. Oh, and she can't stand the way her neck looks. But her dermatologist tells her there's no quick fix for that.

Ephron chronicles her life as an obsessed cook, passionate city dweller, and hapless parent. She recounts her anything-but-glamorous days as a White House intern during the JFK years ("I am probably the only young woman who ever worked in the Kennedy White House that the President did not make a pass at") and shares how she fell in and out of love with Bill Clinton - from a distance, of course. But mostly she speaks frankly and uproariously about life as a woman of a certain age.

Utterly courageous, wickedly funny, and unexpectedly moving in its truth telling, I Feel Bad About My Neck is a book of wisdom, advice, and laugh-out-loud moments, a scrumptious, irresistible treat.

It's been almost 18 years since I read Ephron's collection of humorous essays, but as soon as I finished listening to her sister's memoir (Left on Tenth), I decided to give this book a second reading. It was enjoyable, but maybe not quite as much as the first time around. I marked the same passages as noted in my original review, so click here to read that one.

August 13, 2023

The Anthropocene Reviewed

 

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green
Nonfiction - Essays
2021 Penguin Audio
Narrated by John Green
Finished on August 8, 2023
Rating: 4.5/5 (Very Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

A deeply moving and mind-expanding collection of personal essays in the first ever work of non-fiction from #1 internationally bestselling author John Green.

The Anthropocene is the current geological age, in which human activity has profoundly shaped the planet and its biodiversity. In this remarkable symphony of essays adapted and expanded from his ground-breaking, critically acclaimed podcast, John Green reviews different facets of the human-centered planet - from the QWERTY keyboard and Halley's Comet to Penguins of Madagascar - on a five-star scale.

Complex and rich with detail, the Anthropocene's reviews have been praised as 'observations that double as exercises in memoiristic empathy', with over 10 million lifetime downloads. John Green's gift for storytelling shines throughout this artfully curated collection about the shared human experience; it includes beloved essays along with six all-new pieces exclusive to the book.

John Green has written several novels that have been on my TBR list for many years, but until now, I've only managed to read The Fault in Our Stars, which I loved. I have no excuse for not reading any other books by Green, but I find that unless I have a book in my TBR bookcase, I don't think about it until a) I see it at the library or b) someone mentions it in passing or in a review. My Goodreads list isn't terribly helpful, especially since my "Want to Read" list has over 1,100 titles!

The Anthropocene Reviewed wound up in my audiobook library after reading JoAnn's glowing review in early 2022. As JoAnn mentions, I'd be hard pressed to choose a favorite essay; the range of topics is thought-provoking, humorous, educational, and tender. Halley's Comet, Lascaux Cave Paintings, Diet Dr Pepper, Velociraptors, Canada Geese, Air-Conditioning, The Internet, Piggly Wiggly, The Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest, The Yips, Googling Strangers, Bonneville Salt Flats, The Notes App, and The QWERTY Keyboard are just a few (there are over 40 essays) that I think would interest my husband. As I listened, I found myself wishing that he enjoyed audiobooks--this would be a great one to listen to on a road trip! With that said, I plan to buy a print edition since I think he'd enjoy the book (and he especially likes to read with a highlighter in hand while reading nonfiction). As a matter of fact, I can think of several other relatives and friends who might like this book. It's a couple of years old, but it might make a great Christmas gift for readers in my life. 

About Ratings:
The five-star scale has only been used in critical analysis for the past few decades. While it occasionally applied to film criticism as early as the 1950s, the five-star scale wasn’t used to rate hotels until 1979, and it wasn’t widely used to rate books until Amazon introduced user reviews. The five-star scale really doesn’t exist for humans; it exists for data aggregation systems, which is why it did not become standard until the internet era. Making conclusions about a book’s quality from a 175-word review is hard for artificial intelligences, where as star ratings are ideal for them. (The Anthropocene Reviewed)

Unlike short stories (which I prefer to read one at a time, allowing a break between each story), I couldn't stop listening to these essays. As soon as I finished listening to one, I moved on to the next, inhaling the entire book in just a few days. Green includes numerous quotes by a variety of authors in order to confirm his thoughts; yet another reason to own the print edition.

It took me a few essays before I grew comfortable with the author's narration for the audiobook. He tends to speak in a halting, if not clipped, manner. However, the catch or tremble in his voice during a tender essay made up for his reading.

The Anthropocene Reviewed would make for a great book group selection as there is so much to discuss. The topics would even make for great dinner party conversation! A very satisfying read. Highly recommend.

February 15, 2023

These Precious Days

 

Nonfiction - Essays
2021 Harper
Finished on February 14, 2023
Rating: 5/5 (Excellent)

Note to Reader: No, you are not imagining things. I already posted a review for this book (click here to read) in November. I decided to read it again for my upcoming book group discussion. 

Publisher's Blurb:

“Any story that starts will also end.” As a writer, Ann Patchett knows what the outcome of her fiction will be. Life, however, often takes turns we do not see coming. Patchett ponders this truth in these wise essays that afford a fresh and intimate look into her mind and heart.

At the center of These Precious Days is the title essay, a suprising and moving meditation on an unexpected friendship that explores “what it means to be seen, to find someone with whom you can be your best and most complete self.” When Patchett chose an early galley of actor and producer Tom Hanks’ short story collection to read one night before bed, she had no idea that this single choice would be life changing. It would introduce her to a remarkable woman—Tom’s brilliant assistant Sooki—with whom she would form a profound bond that held monumental consequences for them both.

A literary alchemist, Patchett plumbs the depths of her experiences to create gold: engaging and moving pieces that are both self-portrait and landscape, each vibrant with emotion and rich in insight. Turning her writer’s eye on her own experiences, she transforms the private into the universal, providing us all a way to look at our own worlds anew, and reminds how fleeting and enigmatic life can be.

From the enchantments of Kate DiCamillo’s children’s books to youthful memories of Paris; the cherished life gifts given by her three fathers to the unexpected influence of Charles Schultz’s Snoopy; the expansive vision of Eudora Welty to the importance of knitting, Patchett connects life and art as she illuminates what matters most. Infused with the author’s grace, wit, and warmth, the pieces in These Precious Days resonate deep in the soul, leaving an indelible mark—and demonstrate why Ann Patchett is one of the most celebrated writers of our time.

You know that feeling when you meet someone for the first time and think to yourself, "Wow. I really like her. We have so much in common. I hope I get another chance to spend more time with her!" Well, that's exactly how I felt after reading These Precious Days, and when I finished reading it for the second time this morning, my feelings hadn't changed. This is a gem of a book! I still haven't taken the time to sit down and write a fan letter to the author (can I just call her Ann?), but I plan to. Until then, I can gush about the book on Thursday with my book group. I hope they enjoyed it as much as I did.

In response to an Instagram comment, I had another thought that I'd like to share here: That initial experience when reading a book (or meeting a kindred spirit) is often overshadowed by the flush of excitement to have all of one's questions answered. The second visit is more calm and allows for a discovery of hidden treasures.

December 20, 2022

This is the Story of a Happy Marriage

 

Nonfiction - Essays
2013 Harper Perennial
Finished on December 8, 2022
Rating: 4.5/5 (Very Good)

"As the best personal essays often do, Patchett's is a two-way mirror, reflecting both the author and her readers." --New York Times Book Review

Publisher's Blurb:

Blending literature and memoir, Ann Patchett, author of State of Wonder, Run, and Bel Canto, examines her deepest commitments — to writing, family, friends, dogs, books, and her husband — creating a resonant portrait of a life in This is the Story of a Happy Marriage.

This is the Story of a Happy Marriage takes us into the very real world of Ann Patchett’s life. Stretching from her childhood to the present day, from a disastrous early marriage to a later happy one, it covers a multitude of topics, including relationships with family and friends, and charts the hard work and joy of writing, and the unexpected thrill of opening a bookstore.

As she shares stories of the people, places, ideals, and art to which she has remained indelibly committed, Ann Patchett brings into focus the large experiences and small moments that have shaped her as a daughter, wife, and writer.


Another winner by Ann Patchett! I tried to listen to This is the Story of a Happy Marriage several years ago, but the audio didn't work for me. I bought a signed copy of the book at Parnassus (Patchett's bookstore in Nashville) and as you can see from the above photo, it hit the mark and resonated greatly with me. 

I've always enjoyed, if not loved, Patchett's novels, but I recently read These Precious Days, which is an outstanding collection of essays. Now having read this earlier collection, I can confidently say that Ann Patchett's is not only a stellar writer, but someone with whom I would love to meet. Her essays are thought-provoking and articulate, yet conversational and personal. She prompts the reader to stop and think about something she's just written. Patchett is high on my list for "Which Five Famous People Would You Invite to a Dinner Party?"
Whatever I've become as an essayist, this collection bears the stamp of a writer who got her start in women's magazines: it is full of example and advice. I will never be a war correspondent or an investigative reporter, but the tradition I come from is an honorable one, and at times, daunting. Many of the essays I'm proudest of were made from the things that were at hand--writing and love, work and loss. I may have roamed in my fiction, but this work tends to reflect a life lived close to home. 
Prior to writing her best-selling novels, Patchett worked for eight years as a freelance writer for Seventeen magazine, GQ, Bridal Guide, New York Times Magazine, and Gourmet. In This is the Story of a Happy Marriage, Patchett shares details about her family history, her views on marriage, divorce, and her desire to not have children. Her essay about caring for her grandmother is deeply moving and intimate. She writes about her upbringing and education in the Catholic faith, her friendship with one of the nuns who taught her how to read (in third grade!), how she came to be a co-owner of a bookstore, finally accepting her husband's marriage proposal, and her absolute love for her dog, Rose.

On Writing & Revision:
One method of revision that I find both loathsome and indispensable is reading my work aloud when I'm finished. There are things I can hear--the repetition of words, a particularly flat sentence--that I don't otherwise catch. My friend Jane Hamilton, who is a paragon of patience, has me read my novels to her once I finish. She'll lie across the sofa, eyes closed, listening, and from time to time she'll raise her hand. "Bad metaphor," she'll say, or, "You've already used the word inculcate." She's never wrong.
On Hand Selling Books:
When we had our grand opening the following Saturday, an all-day extravaganza that stretched from early-morning puppet shows to late-night wine and cheese, an estimated three thousand Nashvillians came through the store, devouring books like locusts sweeping through a field of summer wheat. All of us who worked there (not a number I normally include myself in, but in this case I was among them) had waited so long for customers that once they finally came we could not stop telling them what we wanted them to read. One more joy I had failed to consider: that I can talk strangers into reading books that I love. 
As one would expect, I loved "My Road to Hell Was Paved", an essay about traveling with her husband, Karl, in a Winnebago motorhome. She states, 
I believe this is the Fourth Great RV Truth: People who don't like them have never been in one.

I feel like I went out to report on the evils of crack and have come back with a butane torch and a pipe. I went undercover to expose a cult and have returned in saffron robes with my head shaved. I have fallen in love with my recreational vehicle.
This is the Story of a Happy Marriage is an absolute joy to read! I'm looking forward to her upcoming release of Tom Lake (due out in August 2023), but until then, I have Truth & Beauty: A Friendship (which she mentions in her essay "Fact vs. Fiction") yet to read. 

Have you visited Parnassus in Nashville? I highly recommend it, especially if you love dogs! 

Photo Credit: Author's Website




November 15, 2022

These Precious Days

Nonfiction - Essays
2021 Harper
Finished on November 7, 2022
Rating: 5/5 (Outstanding)

Publisher's Blurb:

“Any story that starts will also end.”

As a writer, Ann Patchett knows what the outcome of her fiction will be. Life, however, often takes turns we do not see coming. Patchett ponders this truth in these wise essays that afford a fresh and intimate look into her mind and heart.

At the center of These Precious Days is the title essay, a surprising and moving meditation on an unexpected friendship that explores "what it means to be seen, to find someone with whom you can be your best and most complete self." When Patchett chose an early galley of actor and producer Tom Hanks' short story collection to read one night before bed, she had no idea that this single choice would be life changing. It would introduce her to a remarkable woman–Tom's brilliant assistant Sooki–with whom she would form a profound bond that held monumental consequences for them both.

A literary alchemist, Patchett plumbs the depths of her experiences to create gold: engaging and moving pieces that are both self-portrait and landscape, each vibrant with emotion and rich in insight. Turning her writer's eye on her own experiences, she transforms the private into the universal, providing us all a way to look at our own worlds anew, and reminds how fleeting and enigmatic life can be.

From the enchantments of Kate DiCamillo's children's books (author of the upcoming The Beatryce Prophecy) to youthful memories of Paris; the cherished life gifts given by her three fathers to the unexpected influence of Charles Schultz's Snoopy; the expansive vision of Eudora Welty to the importance of knitting, Patchett connects life and art as she illuminates what matters most. Infused with the author's grace, wit, and warmth, the pieces in These Precious Days resonate deep in the soul, leaving an indelible mark--and demonstrate why Ann Patchett is one of the most celebrated writers of our time.

Last night, I fell asleep composing a fan letter in my head to Ann Patchett. I have often thought of sending such a letter to several of my favorite authors, usually the moment I finish one of their terrific books, but I never follow through. Maybe this time I will.

I have always read more fiction than nonfiction, but when I pick up a nonfiction book, I gravitate toward memoirs and essays. I have read and loved several of Ann Patchett's novels, but These Precious Days is my first venture into her works of nonfiction. Anna Quindlen (Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake), Nora Ephron (I Feel Bad About My Neck), Laurie Colwin (Home Cooking), Barbara Kingsolver (Small Wonder), and Kelly Corrigan (Tell Me More) have written some of my favorite collections of essays. With over two dozen sticky notes littering my copy of These Precious Days, Patchett has joined ranks with that group of amazing authors. 

Typically, a book of essays has some great pieces along with some that don't resonate, but that doesn't hold true with These Precious Days; I loved each and every one of the twenty-two essays, as well as the introduction and epilogue. Like Quindlen, Ephron, Colwin, Kingsolver, and Corrigan, I would love to spend an afternoon, sipping a glass of wine while chatting with Patchett about her bookstore (which I visited last spring while visiting my daughter in Franklin), her novels (and the importance of good cover art), Nashville, Tom Hanks, and why we don't need four colanders and thirty-five dish towels. I would ask her about her favorite authors and which of their books she would recommend. (I love how she wrote about The Collected Stories of Eudora Welty, not just touching on Welty as an author, but speaking specifically about a few of her stories.) 

As I gulped down essay after essay, hopelessly ignoring my inner voice that kept telling me to slow down and savor them, I caught myself thinking about the connections I felt to this woman I had never met. Her husband had a heart scare that turned out not to be a heart attack. But the fear of loss was real, and a fear that I know all too well.
I remember again how valuable he is, how lucky we are. Karl isn't having a heart attack. Byron didn't know what might have caused the pain. Indigestion? Stress? It didn't matter. Karl is beside me. The meeting I'm missing doesn't matter, and Sparky is fine with his dog friends at the bookstore. For as many times as the horrible thing happens, a thousand times in every day the horrible thing passes us by. A meteor could be skating past Earth's atmosphere this very minute. We'll never know how close we came to annihilation, but today I saw it--everything I had and stood to lose and did not lose. Thanks to this fleeting clarity, the glow from the fluorescent tubes on the ceiling of this small cardiac recovery room lights up the entire world. 
I spent over a decade working in bookstores and can wholeheartedly agree with the joy of handselling:
As every reader knows, the social contract between you and a book you love is not complete until you hand that book to someone else and say, Here, you're going to love this. I always thought that sharing the books I loved with my students, requiring them to read those books, was the biggest perk of being a teacher. But at the bookstore, people who actually want my recommendations walk through the door all day long. The students were captives, the customers are volunteers.
Patchett writes about her personal experience with book jackets (and titles) that didn't live up to her expectations.
"Never judge a book by its cover" is a good way of saying that people shouldn't be evaluated on the basis of looks alone, but the adage doesn't apply to actual books. Where books are concerned, covers are what we have to go on. We might be familiar with the author's name or like the title, but absent that information, it's the jacket design--the size and shape of the font, the color, the image or absence of image--that makes us stop at the new releases table of our local independent bookstore and pick up one novel instead of another. Book covers should entice readers the way roses entice bees--like their survival depends on it.
I doubt I'm the only reader guilty of judging books by their cover art. While working in the bookstore, I could tell which face-outs would grab someone's attention and which would be quickly dismissed. I was thrilled when my husband's recent book was published with such an appealing cover. If only I were still working in a bookstore where I could place copies on the new release table, faced out on the appropriate shelf, and stacked neatly near each cash register. Oh, how I'd love to hand sell this book during the Christmas shopping season! Would Ann Patchett be drawn to Rod's beautiful book? And if so, would she pass it on to Tom Hanks? It never hurts to dream!


I can hardly wait to read Patchett's previous work of nonfiction, This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage, which I bought while visiting Parnassus last spring. She is such an exceptional writer!

January 7, 2022

Looking Back - It Was On Fire When I Lay Down On It

Looking Back... In an effort to transfer my book journal entries over to this blog, I'm going to attempt to post (in chronological order) an entry every Friday. I may or may not add extra commentary to what I jotted down in these journals.


Nonfiction
1998 Ballantine Books
Read in December 2000
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

Show-and-Tell was the very best part of school for me, both as a student and as a teacher.

As a kid, I put more into getting ready for my turn to present than I put into the rest of my homework. Show-and-Tell was real in a way that much of what I learned in school was not. It was education that came out of my life experience.

As a teacher, I was always surprised by what I learned from these amateur hours. A kid I was sure I knew well would reach down into a paper bag he carried and fish out some odd-shaped treasure and attach meaning to it beyond my most extravagant expectation.

Again and again I learned that what I thought was only true for me . . . only valued by me . . . only cared about by me . . . was common property. The principles guiding this book are not far from the spirit of Show-and-Tell. It is stuff from home--that place in my mind and heart where I most truly live.

P.S. This volume picks up where I left off in All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, when I promised to tell about the time it was on fire when I lay down on it.

My Original Thoughts (2000):

Pretty good, but not as good as All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. I enjoyed the story about the box of "Good Stuff." Also, his list of recommendations (p. 90) and motherly thoughts (p. 101)

My Current Thoughts:

I wish I had been more specific about what I enjoyed about those particular essays in this book. They are long forgotten after 20 years.

December 20, 2021

I Miss You When I Blink

 

Nonfiction - Essays
2020 Atria (first published in 2019)
Finished on December 11, 2021
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

Acclaimed essayist and bookseller Mary Laura Philpott presents a charmingly relatable and wise memoir-in-essays about what happened after she checked off all the boxes on her successful life's to-do list and realized she might need to reinvent the list--and herself.

Mary Laura Philpott thought she'd cracked the code: Always be right, and you'll always be happy.

But once she'd completed her life's to-do list (job, spouse, house, babies--check!), she found that instead of feeling content and successful, she felt anxious. Lost. Stuck in a daily grind of overflowing calendars, grueling small talk, and sprawling traffic. She'd done everything "right," but she felt all wrong. What's the worse failure, she wondered: smiling and staying the course, or blowing it all up and running away? And are those the only options?

In this memoir-in-essays full of spot-on observations about home, work, and creative life, Philpott takes on the conflicting pressures of modern adulthood with wit and heart. She offers up her own stories to show that identity crises don't happen just once or only at midlife; reassures us that small, recurring personal re-inventions are both normal and necessary; and advises that if you're going to faint, you should get low to the ground first. Most of all, Philpott shows that when you stop feeling satisfied with your life, you don't have to burn it all down and set off on a transcontinental hike (unless you want to, of course). You can call upon your many selves to figure out who you are, who you're not, and where you belong. Who among us isn't trying to do that?

Like a pep talk from a sister, I Miss You When I Blink is the funny, poignant, and deeply affecting book you'll want to share with all your friends, as you learn what Philpott has figured out along the way: that multiple things can be true of us at once--and that sometimes doing things wrong is the way to do life right.

I can't remember where I first read about this book, but you know me--I love memoirs! The reviews must have been pretty good for me to buy rather than check it out from the library. I imagined it might be similar to something by Kelly Corrigan (Tell Me More) or Norah Ephron (I Feel Bad About My Neck) since the blurb claims it's funny, poignant, and deeply affecting. Well... it is a little bit, but unlike with Corrigan and Ephron's books, I only marked one or two passages.

On Motherhood:
I did not know, in those first days, that once you have children, the passage of time feels different than it did before. Everyone says this, and it's true: Days with young children feel four hundred hours long, but years flash by in seconds. I had no idea I'd become one of those parents who posts pictures along with cliched captions like "And just like that... he's ten!" or "Wasn't she a baby just yesterday?" I know, barf. But it was just yesterday that my baby boy got so excited about a jar of creamed spinach that he knocked it out of my hands and sent it clattering across his high-chair tray and onto the kitchen floor. I did just give birth to my daughter last week. How can they be looking back at me with such grown-up faces right now?
On Small Talk:
People who are good at small talk have a handy knack for greasing the gears of social interaction among strangers, and that's useful. I wish I were better at it, truthfully. But when small talk starts replacing real talk, you start to feel like you're among strangers even when you're among friends. I was in a phase in life that required a certain amount of socializing, floating around in blobs of people waving and smiling courteously. I needed my other interactions to balance those out. To offer some real connection, some meaning.  

I Miss You When I Blink might have been better on audio, but I also wonder if I'm not the target audience. I didn't come away with any profound revelations and most, if not all, of the essays are already forgotten after a mere week. I may have found it more relatable twenty years ago when I was working and in the middle of raising a teenager rather than as a sixty-something-year-old retiree. 

November 26, 2021

Looking Back - All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

Looking Back... In an effort to transfer my book journal entries over to this blog, I'm going to attempt to post (in chronological order) an entry every Friday. I may or may not add extra commentary to what I jotted down in these journals.


Nonfiction - Essays
1988 Ballantine Books
Read in November 2000
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

Robert Fulghum engages with musings on life, death, love, pain, joy, sorrow, and the best chicken-fried steak in the continental United States. The little seed in the Styrofoam cup offers a reminder about our own mortality and the delicate nature of life . . . a spider who catches (and loses) a full-grown woman in its web one fine morning teaches us about surviving catastrophe . . . the love story of Jean-Francois Pilatre and his hot-air balloon reminds us to be brave and unafraid to “fly” . . . life lessons hidden in the laundry pile . . . magical qualities found in a box of crayons . . . hide-and-seek vs. sardines—and how these games relate to the nature of God. All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten is brimming with the very stuff of life and the significance found in the smallest details.

My Original Thoughts (2000):

This is the second time I've read this wonderful book and it was just as good as the first time. Nice format of vignettes for evening reading in bed. Laugh out loud humor. I agree with his thoughts on dandelions and raking leaves!

My Current Thoughts:

I no longer own a copy of this book; probably gave it away when we purged our shelves before our big move to Oregon. Since I've already read it a couple of times, I doubt it's one I'll read again. I suspect it's a bit dated at this point.

November 10, 2021

Living Out Loud


Nonfiction - Essays
1989 Ivy Books (first published in 1988)
Finished on November 5, 2021
Rating: 2/5 (Fair)

Publisher's Blurb:

The voice is Anna Quindlen’s. But we know the hopes, dreams, fears, and wonder expressed in all her columns, for most of us share them. With her New York Times-based column, “LIFE IN THE 30s,” Anna Quindlen valued to national attention, and this wonderful collection shows why.

I'm quite a fan of Anna Quindlen's works and have read all but one or two of her books. I've had a copy of this collection of syndicated columns for many, many years and the Nonfiction November challenge was just the nudge I needed to finally dip into it. Each essay is about three pages in length and I wound up reading dozens of the columns back-to-back. It might have been better to read one or two a night, but I was impatient to move on to another book, so I zipped through this one. While it's a fairly quick read, I didn't love the book.

Written for The New York Times in the late 80s, much of Quindlen's essays felt dated and not relevant to my current life. My 60th birthday is just around the corner and the author was in her 30s when she wrote her column. However, I'm not sure my 30-something-year-old daughter would find much that would resonate with her, either.

A couple of entries gave me pause and I found myself thinking that the more things change, the more they remain the same:
My husband and I are educated people, and I can't tell you what a whoop we got out of it when we heard the story--untrue, it developed--that Joe Biden would get back in the race, too. Was that silly or what? "Ted Kennedy's next!" we both shouted. "Nixon," I screamed. "Like the T-shirt says, he's tanned, rested, and ready." (Written after Gary Hart dropped out of the 1988 race for the presidential nomination.)
and
The problem is that we would love absolute certainty on all aspects of this issue. We are a nation raised on True or False tests. We want doctors to give us the answers, which shows how short our memories are. After all, it was the doctors who told us that smoking wouldn't kill you and amphetamines during pregnancy didn't do a bit of harm. We want to know precisely how this disease spreads and why some people who are exposed get it and some don't and whether being exposed means inevitably getting sick. First we hear that the biggest argument against transmission through casual contact is that health-care workers don't get it. Then we hear that health-care workers have gotten it. And we don't know what to believe. All we know for sure is that getting sick means dying, at least so far. (Not about COVID-19, but AIDs)
and
I still read constantly: if my kids ever go into analysis, I'm sure they will say they don't really remember my face because it was always hidden by a book. Obviously this is in part because I like books. But another reason is that I like to be alone. I like to go deep inside myself and not be accompanied there by anyone else. 
When I sat down to write this review, my first thought was that I don't care for Anna Quindlen's books of nonfiction. And yet, as I scrolled through my blog, I discovered that I gave three of those books high ratings. Loud & Clear was, coincidentally, one of my selections for the 2007 Nonfiction November challenge and I gave it a 4/5 rating. Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake and Nanaville also received 4/5 ratings and I shared several favorite passages in each of those reviews. The only remaining book of her essays that I have not yet read is Thinking Out Loud, which was published in 1993. I think I'll pass on that one and read Alternate Side (her latest novel) instead.

September 24, 2021

Looking Back - How Reading Changed My Life

Looking Back... In an effort to transfer my book journal entries over to this blog, I'm going to attempt to post (in chronological order) an entry every Friday. I may or may not add extra commentary to what I jotted down in these journals.


How Reading Changed My Life by Anna Quindlen
Nonfiction - Essays
1998 Library of Contemporary Thought
Read in September 2000
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

A recurring theme throughout Anna Quindlen's How Reading Changed My Life is the comforting premise that readers are never alone. "There was waking, and there was sleeping. And then there were books," she writes, "a kind of parallel universe in which anything might happen and frequently did, a universe in which I might be a newcomer but never really a stranger. My real, true world." Later, she quotes editor Hazel Rochman: "Reading makes immigrants of us all. It takes us away from home, but, most important, it finds homes for us everywhere." Indeed, Quindlen's essays are full of the names of "friends," real or fictional—Anne of Green Gables and Heidi; Anthony Trollope and Jane Austen, to name just a few—who have comforted, inspired, educated, and delighted her throughout her life. In four short essays Quindlen shares her thoughts on the act of reading itself ("It is like the rubbing of two sticks together to make a fire, the act of reading, an improbable pedestrian task that leads to heat and light"); analyzes the difference between how men and women read ("there are very few books in which male characters, much less boys, are portrayed as devoted readers"); and cheerfully defends middlebrow literature: Most of those so-called middlebrow readers would have readily admitted that the Iliad set a standard that could not be matched by What Makes Sammy Run? or Exodus. But any reader with common sense would also understand intuitively, immediately, that such comparisons are false, that the uses of reading are vast and variegated and that some of them are not addressed by Homer.

My Original Thoughts (2000):

Pretty good, but not as good as Ex Libris (Fadiman). A little dry and boring in spots. A few good quotes and passages. 11 great reading lists.

My Current Thoughts:

I own seven books (fiction and nonfiction) by Anna Quindlen, which I've read and loved, but this fell short of my expectations. I wish I had written down some of those good quotes and passages. Ah, well. I can probably borrow a copy from the library and see if my opinion has changed over the years.

August 1, 2021

The Sewing Room


Nonfiction - Essays
1993 Viking
Finished on July 30, 2021
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

A lovely book... honest, funny, sad... impossible to put down. ~ Madeline L'Engle

In these insightful essays, Barbara Cawthorne Crafton reflects on a broad range of experiences ministering among merchant seafarers, the homeless, the bereaved, AIDS patients, and others in need of personal and spiritual help. She shares honestly her own emotions as she grapples with the harsh realities of the world, while delighting in the humor and joy found in everyday living.

Crafton compassionately recounts the unique stories of the men, women, and children she worked with during her service as a port chaplain in New York and New Jersey and as a minister at Trinity Church on Wall Street. In doing so, she weaves together threads of the mundane and the traumatic, the lovely and the ugly, and the down to earth and the holy, creating an original tapestry of the richness of life.

I wrote about this book in a "Looking Back" post in 2016 and finally got around to pulling it off my shelf for a second reading in May of this year. I wish I could say that I enjoyed it as much as my first reading (rated 4/5), but it wasn't as impressive, although I did like it... just not enough to want to keep my copy for another reading. Of the original passages I highlighted, these are what still remain my favorites:
People are what matter... Everything comes back to people: people I love, people I've disappointed, people I worry about, people I mourn.

and

At this annual conference, there are always facial tissues in the welcome kit. The participants cry a lot.

It is the annual conference of The Compassionate Friends, an organization of people whose children have died. There are two thousand people here: mothers and fathers, brothers and sisters, grandparents. A sprinkling of clergy and others in the helping professions. I fit several of these categories. I am a priest. I am the mother of a dead child and the stepmother of another. I never knew the young man my husband misses so mightily. It wasn't until after he died that I met his dad. But I have dreamed of him. My own dead child never saw my face; he was too small to see, too small to cry, too small to live. But I saw him. Sixteen years later, I see him still. And in a dozen years of ordained ministry, I have watched the bedsides and prayed at the gravesides of many young people. Too many. But then, even one would have been too many.

From my previous blog entry in 2016:

My Original Notes (1996):

My mother gave me this book; both she and my grandmother read it and highly recommended it. Nice short essays. "Uncommon reflections on life, love, and work." Some reminded me so much of my grandmother... Strange to know she was reading this just a few weeks before her death.

My Current Thoughts: 

I've had a draft of this post for several years now. Every time I start to share it, I find myself flipping through the pages of the book, re-reading passages, wondering why some spoke to me back in 1996, while others are still just as powerful as they were 20 years ago. I rarely re-read books, but maybe this is the year.

On the passage of years:
But years pass again, and life changes. Love comes again. Marriage. My youngest child is almost grown, and I am astonished at how brief this era, almost past, has been. How brief my life has been. I am aware that the decades left to me will seem even briefer, so they had better be sweet. If I do not capture and celebrate what art I have, it will die. If I do not nourish myself, I will yearn for nourishment. If I do not connect myself with my own past in the things I do now, I will remain adrift from it. Those whom I have loved in the past cannot catch hold of me, for they are dead. It is I who must catch them.
On the loss of a child: 
How long has it been since your son died, he asks? Five years. The man looks at my husband and tries to imagine himself surviving five years of this. He can't. He asks if it gets any easier. It gets different, my husband answers. Not exactly easier. It's hard to explain.
On parental worry:
Separateness with love, though, recognizing that my child is a separate person with a destiny separate from my own, a destiny I cannot completely control:  that's frightening.
... Now you know other fears at night. The stakes are a lot higher. Fears that don't spring from a neurotic need to control everything, but from an accurate assessment of what the world is like. The world is sometimes a dangerous place in which to live. There are things out there that can really hurt your child. And so, you worry.
On imperfection:
I told them that it is good to have one's faults unambiguously revealed from time to time, in order that one may know wherein it is that we are acceptable. It is not in our perfection that we are loved. It is in the honest confession of our imperfection. Our clear conscience does not come from our assurance that we have not sinned. It comes from our assurance that we are forgiveable.

April 23, 2021

Looking Back - Ex LIbris

Looking Back... In an effort to transfer my book journal entries over to this blog, I'm going to attempt to post (in chronological order) an entry every Friday. I may or may not add extra commentary to what I jotted down in these journals.



Nonfiction
1998 Farrar, Straus and Giroux
Finished on April 29, 2000
Rating: 3/5 (Good)

Publisher's Blurb:

Anne Fadiman is--by her own admission--the sort of person who learned about sex from her father's copy of Fanny Hill, whose husband buys her 19 pounds of dusty books for her birthday, and who once found herself poring over her roommate's 1974 Toyota Corolla manual because it was the only written material in the apartment that she had not read at least twice.

This witty collection of essays recounts a lifelong love affair with books and language. For Fadiman, as for many passionate readers, the books she loves have become chapters in her own life story. Writing with remarkable grace, she revives the tradition of the well-crafted personal essay, moving easily from anecdotes about Coleridge and Orwell to tales of her own pathologically literary family. As someone who played at blocks with her father's 22-volume set of Trollope ("My Ancestral Castles") and who only really considered herself married when she and her husband had merged collections ("Marrying Libraries"), she is exquisitely well equipped to expand upon the art of inscriptions, the perverse pleasures of compulsive proof-reading, the allure of long words, and the satisfactions of reading out loud. There is even a foray into pure literary gluttony--Charles Lamb liked buttered muffin crumbs between the leaves, and Fadiman knows of more than one reader who literally consumes page corners. Perfectly balanced between humor and erudition, Ex Libris establishes Fadiman as one of our finest contemporary essayists.

My Original Thoughts (2000):

Fadiman speaks joyfully of books, book collecting, and book ownership. 18 charming essays - my favorites are Marrying Libraries, Never Do That to a Book, Inse^t a Carrot, Eternal Ink, The Catalogical Imperative, and My Odd Shelf.

My Current Thoughts:

I was surprised to discover a copy of this book in my bookcase. I thought it wound up in the discard pile when I was culling my books before our move four years ago, but I must have decided it was worth keeping in spite of not loving it. I find that when I read a collection of short stories, poetry or essays, there may be a handful that I enjoy, but not usually the majority of the offerings. I love books about books, so I'll give Ex Libris another read and see how I feel about it now some time has passed since my first reading.