Forever Young

Daughter, sister, mother, friend. 

Forever loved forever missed.

2.17.81 - 5.28.05

Reposting - Christmas Memories

Reposting from Christmas 2008...

Rachel Elizabeth Scher

Thanks to Cornflower, I just discovered the following from Sir Roy Strong's A Country Life: At Home in the English Countryside. As Karen states, this resonates with so many of us during this Christmas season.

“Christmas is Janus-faced. One side is joy, the other grief. It opens gates of memory firmly locked into a corner of the mind for the rest of the year. But when the festive season beckons those gates open and the past comes back to take us in its embrace. Christmas is always as much about those not there as about those present. The card no longer received because the sender is no more, the telephone which does not ring this year to remind us of a friendship around the globe, the person who is not at the table, the visit which is no longer made.

“But then the sadness fades, for that gate lets in not only tears of grief but those of joy, and thankfulness, too. Memory’s sacred role is to hold in the mind all those whom one has loved. At Christmas they come tumbling back in a season when recollection pulls strongly on the emotions. How often over these days leading into the New Year does the conversation harken back to times past, to people and events long since gone.....

“Always the twelve days of Christmas take on the character of a garland of friendship through time, for not only those of yesterday are recalled, but those of today rekindled. We are reminded of their centrality in any life. Age and bad times make them a bedrock, giving us strength to go forward into whatever the new year will bring.”

Thinking of those of you who have recently lost a loved one.

Remembering Peachoo

Rachel Elizabeth Scher
February 17, 1981 - May 28, 2005

Remember

Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you plann’d:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.
~ Christina Georgina Rossetti (1830 – 1894)

For more pictures of our beautiful daughter, go here.

Christmas Memories

Rachel Elizabeth Scher

Thanks to Cornflower, I just discovered the following from Sir Roy Strong's A Country Life: At Home in the English Countryside. As Karen states, this resonates with so many of us during this Christmas season.

“Christmas is Janus-faced. One side is joy, the other grief. It opens gates of memory firmly locked into a corner of the mind for the rest of the year. But when the festive season beckons those gates open and the past comes back to take us in its embrace. Christmas is always as much about those not there as about those present. The card no longer received because the sender is no more, the telephone which does not ring this year to remind us of a friendship around the globe, the person who is not at the table, the visit which is no longer made.

“But then the sadness fades, for that gate lets in not only tears of grief but those of joy, and thankfulness, too. Memory’s sacred role is to hold in the mind all those whom one has loved. At Christmas they come tumbling back in a season when recollection pulls strongly on the emotions. How often over these days leading into the New Year does the conversation harken back to times past, to people and events long since gone.....

“Always the twelve days of Christmas take on the character of a garland of friendship through time, for not only those of yesterday are recalled, but those of today rekindled. We are reminded of their centrality in any life. Age and bad times make them a bedrock, giving us strength to go forward into whatever the new year will bring.”

Thinking of those of you who have recently lost a loved one.

In Memory Of...

Worldwide Candle Lighting

Brief Hiatus

Update: After three exhausting days, the case came to its final conclusion this afternoon at 2 pm with a sentence of capital life. That's essentially life without parole (and no appeals, whatsoever).

We knew that part of this process would involve meeting the other families who lost their loved ones in this horrific crime. In addition to viewing their beautiful videos and family pictures, we listened (and cried along with them) during their emotionally-wrought victim impact statements. We spent quite a bit of time with all of these folks (both in and outside of the courtroom) and Rod and I both felt an enormous amount of kindness and compassion from everyone involved, including the attorneys and support staff in the Commonwealth Attorney's office. They're are all wonderful, wonderful people and I am only sorry that we had to all meet under such terrible circumstances.

Once again, I'd like to thank each and every one of you who have left comments here on this site or notes via email or regular mail. We appreciate all the love and concern you've shown our family during the past 3 1/2 years. We truly don't know how we could have managed without the love and support of our family and friends.




For those of you who've been following this blog (or my first one) for the past few years, you're probably well aware that our daughter was killed back in 2005. It's hard to believe it's been over three years... In any event, the case is finally going to trial. Or, rather, a sentencing hearing. So we're off to Virginia Beach. I should be back online next weekend. Good thoughts are appreciated, as there's just no way this is going to be a good trip.

Times Like These
Jack Johnson

in times like these
in times like those
what will be will be
and so it goes
and it always goes on and on...
and on and on it goes

and there's always been laughing, crying, birth, and dying
boys and girls with hearts that take and give and break
and heal and grow and recreate and raise and nurture
but then hurt from time to times like these
and times like those
what will be will be
and so it goes

and there will always be stop and go and fast and slow
action, reaction, sticks and stones and broken bones
those for peace and those for war
and god bless these ones not those ones
but these ones made times like these
and times like those
what will be will be
and so it goes
and it always goes on and on...
and on and on it goes

but somehow i know it won't be the same
somehow i know it'll never be the same

(Go here to listen)

Wordless Wednesday

Rachel Elizabeth Scher
February 17, 1981 - May 28, 2005

This & That

It feels like I've been away from my blog for more than just four days. Perhaps it's the overwhelming number of comments that have yet to be answered. And they will, as I'm too obsessive to let them go without a response. (Speaking of which, have you all seen Blogger's new feature? They'll send you an email notifying you of responses made to comments! How cool is that?!) Perhaps it's the out-dated "Currently Reading" sidebar picture. Or maybe it's just been a long, long week. Worry and stress certainly wear me out, but it's a new day, the sun's shining, and I've had a good night's sleep. Sometimes, that's all that's needed.

Updates on the Southern California fires -- My relatives are all safe. Thankfully, nobody lost their home. I still can't imagine what the area looks like and how sad it is for those who did lose everything they own. Such a terrible tragedy.

I haven't forgotten about the book drawing for A Great and Terrible Beauty. As a matter of fact, I drew the winning name last weekend, but got preoccupied and haven't had a chance to make an announcement. So, without further ado, the winner is.... Nat (In Spring it Is the Dawn). When you return from your fun vacation, drop me an email with your snail mail addy and I'll get this in the mail.

And speaking of mailing books, Janet in Fort Worth gets my copy of Consuming Passions by Michael Lee West. Janet, I'll need your snail mail addy, too.

I haven't made much progress on any of my books this past week. As much as I love the capabilities of the Internet, bringing live news & information from around the world (San Diego's Channel 10 live coverage of the fires was far too informative to turn off), it can certainly interfere with one's daily responsibilities and reading time. I'm glad I was able to keep up on the fires, but now it's time to resume life in Nebraska.

After several short stories, I gave up on Stephen King's Everything's Eventual. I have one more book to complete Carl's R.I.P. II Challenge, so I grabbed a copy of New Moon (Stephenie Myer) and hope to have it read by Wednesday.

I started The Worst Hard Time, but had to return it to the library unread. The introduction was fascinating and my husband raved about the book, so I imagine I'll get to it eventually.

So what am I currently reading? Well, I have an ARC of Kelly Corrigan's The Middle Place. Corrigan is a newspaper columnist and her talent is quite apparent. Her memoir is very readable and informative. I have a good feeling about it.

I'm also reading C.S. Lewis' A Grief Observed. I initially bought it for my daughter, wanting so desperately to do something to help her through a recent loss. My former mother-in-law passed away on Wednesday after a 17-year-long battle with cancer. While I haven't had an active relationship with N. for nearly 23 years, we have kept in touch here and there throughout the years. Birthdays were remembered. Christmas greetings sent. Condolences expressed. And, quite fortunately, a face-to-face visit last December when we gathered to see my daughter graduate from TCU. N. was one of those rare individuals who was always cheerful. I never once heard her say anything negative about anyone. She was always so optimistic and upbeat and full of life. Amy was her first grandchild and they shared quite a bond, so this loss is hitting hard. For both of us.

I bought the book with hopes that it might bring some comfort to Amy. But after scanning the introduction, I quickly realized the focus is more about the loss of a spouse. It didn't seem like a book she'd be interested in, so I decided to keep it and have already read the first two chapters. Review to come soon.

And lastly, as if the week couldn't have gotten any worse, we learned the upcoming trial in January has been "continued" once again. We are now scheduled for April 15th. Don't ask me why. I've lost all faith in the justice system. It is what it is. There simply isn't anything to say or do about this, other than to hope all is wrapped up and finalized before May 28th.

And now, off to enjoy the beautiful day.

Two Years

Meetai dikir nemesheyui.
There is no hill that never ends.
(Maasai proverb)

Rachel Elizabeth Scher

February 17, 1981 - May 28, 2005

Hot fun in the summertime
Del Mar, California (1987)

Family reunion
Depoe Bay, Oregon (2001)

Sisters & Friends
Christmas 2004

Our first (and last!) family camping trip
Sequoia National Park, CA (1987)

Learning how to crochet
Christmas 2004

More beach fun!
Virginia Beach, VA

This year I'm posting pictures that make me smile. Rachel had such a beautiful smile and she always managed to make those around her laugh or giggle. She could light up a room with her joie de vivre.

If she could pick just one song for us, I believe she'd choose this:

Better Things
(Ray Davies)

Here's wishing you the bluest sky,
And hoping something better comes tomorrow.
Hoping all the verses rhyme,
And the very best of choruses to
Follow all the doubt and sadness.
I know that better things are on the way.

Here's hoping all the days ahead
Won't be as bitter as the ones behind you.
Be an optimist instead,
And somehow happiness will find you.
Forget what happened yesterday,
I know that better things are on the way.

It's really good to see you rocking out
And having fun,
Living like you just begun.
Accept your life and what it brings.
I hope tomorrow you'll find better things.
I know tomorrow you'll find better things.

Here's wishing you the bluest sky,
And hoping something better comes tomorrow.
Hoping all the verses rhyme,
And the very best of choruses to
Follow all the drudge and sadness.
I know that better things are on the way.

I know you've got a lot of good things happening up ahead.
The past is gone it's all been said.
So here's to what the future brings,
I know tomorrow you'll find better things.
I know tomorrow you'll find better things.

As long as you mention my name, I live!
African proverb

We Will Remember You

In the rising of the sun and in its going down,
we remember them.
When we are weary and in need of strength,
we remember them.
When we are lost and sick at heart,
we remember them.
When we have joys we yearn to share,
we remember them.
So long as we live, they too shall live,
for they are now a part of us, as
we remember them.
In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,
we remember them.
In the opening of buds and in the rebirth of spring,
we remember them.
In the blueness of the sky and in the warmth of summer,
we remember them.
In the rustling of leaves and in the beauty of autumn,
we remember them.
In the beginning of the year and when it ends,
we remember them.
From the Rabbi's Manual

And on her 26th birthday,
we remember her.

Rachel Elizabeth Scher
February 17, 1981 - May 28, 2005